


Demons - a mini AU *rewritten*

by Stanbillyhargrove



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Eating Disorders, F/M, Self-Harm, Sexual Assault, Suicide, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-06
Updated: 2020-05-06
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:47:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24046150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stanbillyhargrove/pseuds/Stanbillyhargrove
Summary: Billy finds out about Cat's assault early on, but from one of the guys who did it. Cat gets pushed into Steve's arms
Relationships: Billy Hargrove/Original Female Character(s), Steve Harrington/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 6





	Demons - a mini AU *rewritten*

Cat's POV

Another party. Another house full of nameless faces. Another night of barely managing panic with burning alcohol.  
What the queen must do for her king.  
Push down the memories. Smile. Accept every drink and more. Dance, laugh. Don't freak when a stray hand touches, it's harmless fun, right?  
Right.  
I lost Billy early on in the night, swept away in a sea of jocks to protect his crown. I was left behind, letting the music pound through my bones as I joined the crowd of dancers. I was well and truly wasted by the time I saw Billy across the room. He was standing in the kitchen, arms crossed against his chest as he stared at me. Saw a pack of guys I barely recognized around him, talking and laughing and then...gesturing at me. I watched Billy's shoulders tense, rolling back tightly as they kept talking to him. Watched his jaw tense and his eyes darken.  
The guys around him stared and I glanced away when flashes of memory came back, making panic swell. Felt myself being bumped around by chaotic dancers when I stopped moving. Just a moment, a moment of blood pounding in my ears. Of trying to gulp down breaths. My hands came up to my chest, like I could hold myself together and stop my heart from thundering out of my ribs if I just held tight enough.  
A moment of panic taking over until I felt a large hand on my arm, yanking me through the crowd. I stumbled along, just trying to stay upright until I was pulled outside, being shoved down the driveway by a very angry Billy.  
"Wait, Billy, slow down! You're hurting me!"  
He let go of my arm with the next push forward, my hands flying up to catch myself on the hood of his car before I ended up face first in the gravel.  
"Billy! What the fuck?"  
"Get in the fucking car," he growled, storming around to the driver's side and slamming the door shut behind him.  
I crawled into the passenger seat, tucking myself against the door as he peeled out of the driveway. He was weirdly quiet, muscles clenching in his jaw and hands flexing on the steering wheel. Beyond angry.  
"B, what's wrong?"  
The engine revved louder, creeping up to dangerous speeds as we whipped around corners.  
"B, please. Slow down," I pleaded, reaching out to graze his arm.  
He flinched, "don't."  
"Don't? Billy, what's wrong?"  
"Don't play fucking dumb!" He yelled, "you cheated on me!"  
I stared at him, dumbfounded and whispered, "what?"  
He stomped on the brake, launching me forward until my seatbelt locked, digging into skin to stop me from flying into the dashboard. Let out a loud huff of breath as he threw the car into park and then...he exploded.  
"The last summer party, I wasn't there so you threw yourself at them. What? You're so needy you couldn't handle being alone for a few fucking hours so you sleep with a fucking group of guys?"  
I shook my head, "no...I, that's not..."  
"Quit lying to me! They told me all about it, that you asked for it! They bragged about how good you were. You refuse to sleep with me but a group of strangers is fine? Seriously? Just to fuck with my head? To get back at me? Well, good fucking job! You got me!"  
"B...no..I didn't..."  
"Get out," he muttered.  
I quickly glanced out the window behind him, at the blackness of the night, the houses I knew were closer to his house than mine.  
"B..."  
"Get out of my car, you fucking whore!"  
I scrambled to get out of the car, barely holding back tears until he peeled away.  
I collapsed just inside the door of my house when I finally got home. Fell against the door, hugging my knees and sobbing loudly into them. Crawled to the phone, pulling it down to the floor to dial. It took a while before he finally answered.  
"Hello?" His voice was low and groggy, still mostly asleep.  
"Stevie?" I sobbed, "I need you."  
"Five minutes," he murmured before hanging up.  
I curled up on the floor, feeling like my chest was cracking open. A jagged chasm starting at my heart and spreading out, threatening to break me to pieces and swallow me down.  
I didn't hear Steve's car pull into the driveway, didn't notice the front door opening. I just suddenly felt myself being scooped up, pulled forward into a warm chest and tucked under his chin. Holding me together.  
Steve sat there, running his hand up and down my back as I cried into his chest. The soft material of his shirt soaking up saltwater until it clung to his skin.  
"It's okay," he murmured into my hair, "I'm here. I'm always here."

\-- Steve's POV

Cat and I had been inseparable for the past couple weeks since her and Billy broke up. I'd spent more nights wrapped around her then I spent by myself. I found myself having nightmares more often that not and preferred to not spend the night alone, but we would compromise with calling each other if we had to be apart.  
Nightmares where I was running through a sea of people, struggling to break free of them. Where I knew Cat was in danger but I could never find her until it started raining. Cold water poured from the sky, dissolving the people I'd been pushing through until I was face to face with Cat. "Why didn't you save me?" She'd cry. The rain turned to acidic blood, burning me and staining her skin as I watched her shrinking before my eyes. Skin stretched tight over jutting bones until it burst, leaving jagged rips in her skin. "Why didn't you save me?" She'd cry again. "I'm trying!" I'd scream. But she always dissolved into ash, floating away into nothing. Then I'd jolt awake, panting and panicked, sometimes waking Cat and Rocky when I did. Cat would roll over to sleepily nuzzle her face into my bare chest and stretch her hand across my stomach to intertwine her fingers with mine while murmuring, "it's okay, I'm here, Stevie." The nights I didn't wake her, I'd wrap my arms tight around her, holding my breath as I waited to feel her chest moving and then I'd sigh into her hair and wait for sleep to take me again.  
She had eventually stopped crying every night, but I could tell she was hiding how she was really feeling. Even though she would laugh and smile around me, I could still see her slowly wasting away, could see hollows become darker and angles become sharper. I could see the hurt that she had buried deep inside. I wanted nothing more than to take that away, to bring the light back to her life and keep her protected. To stop my nightmares from becoming reality.  
Tonight, Cat had gone home by herself with the promise to call me later. She had said she wanted to spend some time with her mom. But it was nearing eleven o'clock and I still hadn't heard from her, usually if she was alone she would have called by nine or ten. My worry got the best of me and I decided to just drive over and check on her.  
I was met with a quiet house. Too quiet. I ducked into Cat's room first and found it empty except for Rocky. I padded over to the bathroom and knocked lightly on the door.  
"Cat? You in here?"  
I waited in silence for a moment before pushing the door open and freezing. I felt like my heart had dropped into my stomach and kicked up into my throat at the same time. My throat was so tight I didn't think I was actually breathing, except I could hear the quick, panicky breaths I was taking.  
Cat was lying in a tub full of water, only wearing a bra and underwear. I'd seen her naked before, knew that she was sick but there was still no way to be prepared. No way to prepare yourself to see the hollows between her bones, the new and old scars across her body. It broke my heart to see her, to know that I wasn't able to protect her from this. From herself.  
Her head lolled against the side of the tub, just barely out of the water. I lurched forward, dropping down hard on my knees next to the tub and yanked the plug out before grabbing the sides of her face.  
"Cat, hey!" I gently slapped her cheek, trying to wake her up.  
I saw her eyes twitch and felt a moment of relief. I looked around for a towel and saw an empty bottle of aspirin lying on the ground next to the tub.  
"Fuck," I muttered, "fuck, fuck, fuck, okay."  
I knew what I had to try, had heard what to do in this situation before. So I climbed into the tub behind her, holding her cold, wet body against my chest and reached forward to turn the shower on. Warm water sprayed over us, soaking my clothes.  
"Come on, Cat," I pleaded, pressing my fingers past her lips, "please, don't leave me."  
I pressed harder, my fingers dipping into her throat. I tensed when her body jerked and kept pushing my fingers down her throat until she puked. Tipped her forward to direct the puke into the drain and then leaned back to let her head rest on my shoulder.  
"Hey, come on, Cat. Wake up, please."  
I tried to shake her, which only resulted in a small groan. I had to force her to puke twice more before she started coughing and her eyes fluttered open.  
"Oh my god," I sighed, wrapping my arms around her, "it's okay, I'm here, I've got you."  
She tipped her head into my chest and started crying, clutching my shirt in her hands.  
"Why...why would you...?"  
"I didn't-"  
"Don't...there's no way you can tell me this isn't exactly what it looks like. Why didn't you call me?"  
She curled tighter against me and I had to bite the inside of my cheek to hold back tears.  
"I'm sorry," she whimpered, "I'm so sorry, Stevie."  
"Hey," I soothed, "we're okay, I've got you."  
I leaned forward to turn the water off and pulled Cat up and out of the tub.  
"Where are the towels?"  
She gestured towards a closet and I got her to sit on the edge of the tub before I went to gather towels. When we were mostly dried off I picked her up and carried her to her room where I set her on the edge of her bed and kneeled down to look at her.  
"Cat, where's your mom?"  
"Gone, another work thing," she murmured, "said she'd be gone for a while."  
"Come stay with me."  
"Stevie, I'm okay...I swear, I didn't...it was an accident."  
I reached forward to grab her hands in mine, "you don't have to lie to me, I want to help you. Pack a bag and come stay with me."  
I was able to hold myself together until Cat was unpacking in my room and I left to empty medicine cabinets and hide the contents. It hit me then that I had just saved her life. That there had been a possibility of losing my best friend. I broke, sitting at the kitchen table. Buried my face in my hands and just let the sobs wrack my body until my throat felt hoarse.  
Soon enough, small, cool hands wrapped around me and I felt Cat's face nuzzle into the crook of my neck. Felt the saltwater on her face as it dragged, soothing heated skin. I reached up with one arm, my fingers sliding through damp hair to hold her close.  
I shivered when I felt her lips against my neck as she whispered, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Stevie."  
\--  
I had a new nightmare now. I was walking on a beach, surrounded by eery silence even though waves crashed angrily next to me. The moonlight cast a silver shine off the top of the water but there still wasn't enough light for me to see further than what was right in front of me. And then a flash of lightning and suddenly, I could hear everything. The roar of the water, the sand sliding under my feet, a mournful siren wailing in the distance, it was too much, too loud to think. I was running, feet sinking deep into the sand, running as fast as I could but going nowhere. Then another flash of lightning and everything settled. Crashing waves stilled, frozen in the air. The wailing didn't stop though, just became quieter and more haunting. My feet were stuck in the sand when I saw her, washed up on the beach. Cat's pale skin had started to turn blue. I struggled, trying to get to her, but the more I fought, the deeper I sunk in the sand. I tried to claw my way out, desperate to save her, but my arms were swallowed up. The sand consumed me until my head was barely above it and I couldn't move anymore. Another flash of lightning and the waves came down on her, sweeping her away. In an instant, she was gone, carried off into the dark. My screaming only stopped when sand filled my mouth.  
\--  
The nightmares were catching up to me, keeping me up at night and exhausted all day. I'd been struggling to stay awake all day, my eyes getting heavier and heavier as the day wore on.   
"What happened, Harrington? You look like shit. You know she's just another whore," Billy sneered, leaning against the lockers next to me, "not worth losing sleep over."  
I rolled my eyes and huffed, "fuck off, Hargrove."  
"Unless she's keeping you up a different way?" He smirked, a cruel glint in his eye, "that your thing? Get some friends together and pass her around? I hear she begs for it. You should invite me some time, I never got a chance."  
I knew it was stupid, that he was bigger than me, stronger than me and could easily pummel me into the ground. But it didn't stop me from throwing the first punch. I got in a few punches before I was down on the ground, no longer fighting, just trying to protect my face.  
All around us, people were yelling. Some cheering on the fight, some screaming for us to stop. Suddenly, Billy was yanked off me and held back by one of the guys on the football team. I was helped up to my feet, my head pounding as I glared at him.  
"She was raped, you fucking asshole!" I spat, "those creeps drugged and raped your girlfriend and you just tossed her to the side! She needed help and you abandoned her!"  
I didn't even realize that had come out of my mouth until I heard the reaction of the crowd around us. The gasps and murmuring. Billy's face dropped just before I heard.  
"Steve?"  
I turned to see Cat behind me, her face full of hurt and shock, eyes wide and full of tears. I knew I had fucked up, big time.  
She turned and ran. Away from the school and away from me.  
\--  
"Steve, I can't do this anymore. People won't stop talking, whispering behind my back. I don't know what's worse, the pitying looks some people give me or the accusing looks from people who still believe the lies. All I know is...I'm sorry...love you, Stevie."  
Cat's voice on the answering machine sent chills down my spine. It was hollow, cold and lifeless. I knew what that voice meant, where her head was. I grabbed my keys and ran out to my car, cursing every second that ticked by.  
I found her, barely conscious in a pool of blood. Choked on my sobs as I wrapped her wrists in bandages with shaking hands. Carried her to her room and helped her change into clean clothes before tucking her into bed. Saw the way her bones were even more prominent now than ever before. I stained my hands red cleaning up her blood and threw clothes and towels into the laundry machine. Scrubbed my hands raw trying to clean them before giving up and grabbing Cat something to drink and going back to her room.  
I sat down on the edge of her bed with a heavy sigh, "Cat, you're out of control."  
"Stevie.." she breathed.  
"You lied...you lied to me and said you were fine," I choked, trying and failing to keep myself together, "I can't keep doing this, Cat. I can't let you keep destroying yourself...I can't lose you."  
"I'm sorry..I don't mean to be a problem.."  
I blinked tears out of my eyes and looked over at her, "please. Please, Cat. You need help. I can help you get treatment, or we can try to get through this ourselves but you need to want help. You need to let me help you," I pleaded, "please."  
"I don't think I can.."  
"You can, I believe in you. I'll be here to help, I'm always here for you. I won't give up on you. Please, try...for me? Let me take care of you."  
She looked down, away from me, "you don't have to, Stevie. It'll be awful work."  
I shifted so I could grab the side of her face in my hand, "not to me, not if it's you...I know it won't be easy but I want to," I took a moment before blurting out, "I love you. I love you so much, Cat. Let me help you, please?"  
I felt her hand on my cheek, her thumb moving to brush tears away. I clasped my other hand around hers keeping it there and leaned into her touch. Leaned into the thought that everything will be okay, that she'll be okay and just let myself have that.  
\--  
I could see Cat coming across the parking lot towards my car, moving slowly and giving me a tired smile when she caught me staring. I'd spent the weekend with her, changing bandages and doing my best to get her to eat small bits of food throughout the day. Something to try and bring her energy up, but she had slept most of the weekend and was still drained this morning. She wore one of my sweaters over her own, for extra warmth and for the longer sleeves to hide her bandages under.   
She was almost at my car when Billy stepped out in front of her. Put himself between us and stopped her with a hand on her shoulder.  
"Cat, can we talk?"  
She hesitated before jerking her head to nod, "okay."  
"I just..I was a fucking asshole. I shouldn't have just taken their word, I should have asked you what happened."  
"Thanks," she mumbled, trying to move around him.  
Billy caught her wrist in his hand and I had to hold myself back when I saw her wince, her whole body tensing as she tried not to react.  
"Wait, please," his grip loosened to slide up her arm as he drew closer.  
My teeth were on edge, clenched together so tight I thought they'd crack. I kept Cat in my sight, ready to step in if she needed me.  
"I love you," he murmured, "don't you get it? We could be together again."  
She looked down for a moment, her eyes glassy when she looked past Billy's shoulder towards me. There was a moment where I thought she'd be back in his arms. I took a small step forward, waiting.  
Cat stepped out of his grasp, "no, we can't."  
She walked around him at the same time I continued forward to meet her halfway. I wrapped my arms around her when she buried her face in my chest and kissed the top of her head. I cast a glance toward Billy, who looked hurt and angry before storming off to his Camaro and tucked my face against Cat's hair. Breathed in her vanilla scent and felt love shining in my chest.  
"I'm here, I've got you," I whispered, holding her tight.  
\--  
"Stevie," Cat murmured, "is something going on?"  
I took a deep breath and buried my face in the crook of her neck, shaking my head softly. I'm fine, I need to be fine.  
She rolled in my arms so she could face me, "what is it? Talk to me."  
My heart started to race as my eyes began to water. I tried to blink back the tears, I need to be fine.  
"I'm fine," my voice wavered.  
"Don't lie, not to me."  
I blew out my breath, feeling my lip tremble when the words hit my tongue.  
"What is it about me that's not good enough?"  
"What?" She leaned up on her elbow, worry creasing her eyebrows.  
Tears started to roll down my face, "am I doing something wrong?"  
"Oh, Stevie," she soothed, her hand coming up to hold my face, "no, you're not doing anything wrong. Why would you think that?"  
I held her hand tight, pressing it to my face and let my fears out, "you're not getting any better...and I just, I can't...those times I found you, I thought I'd lost you and it almost destroyed me. I don't, don't know what I'd do if you died...I couldn't bear it, not if I could have saved you. Please, tell me what you need...what can I do?"  
\--  
"Stevie? What are you doing here?"  
It was just starting to cool down as the sun began to set and I had planned a surprise date for us. The back of my car had everything I needed to take Cat on a picnic before driving out of town to the drive in theatre.  
I reached out and took her hand in mine, "I planned a surprise date for us. If you want to come with me, that is."  
She smiled, her eyes twinkling as she looked at me, "I'd love to. Do I need anything? Am I dressed okay?"  
Cat was dressed in one of my sweaters, a dark blue one that hung loose over her frame and almost reached her knees, and a pair of dark leggings. Black hair piled messily on top of her head. She looked relaxed, beautiful.  
"You're perfect," I murmured.  
"A picnic?" Cat held her arms crossed over her waist, still nervous even though we'd been working together to help her get better, "I don't know..."  
I flattened out a blanket overlooking the lake and turned back to her. Crossed to grab her hands in mine and loop them around my neck and smoothed my hands down her back.  
"It's okay, I'm here," I whispered, touching my forehead to hers, "you can do this. You're so strong and so beautiful...inside and out. Trust me?"  
Her fingers combed through my hair, sending chills down my spine, "yes."  
I kissed her forehead softly before leading her to sit on the blanket and started pulling out the food I'd brought. I pulled out containers of fruit, cheese and crackers and a couple of drinks and set them down in front of us.  
"This is only part one of our date, so I just brought a snack."  
In truth, I knew bringing too much food would stress Cat out, but I made sure to pack things I knew she liked to hopefully get her to have more. She smiled, grabbed a bright, red strawberry from a container and scooted over so she could lean against me. 'Don't think, just eat,' was the motto we'd come up with so she started idly talking about her day, what she was going to do for the rest of the weekend and what she wanted my help with for class. We sat there and watched the sun set over Lover's Lake, just relaxing and enjoying our time together. Cat ended up eating more than I thought she would, distracted by talking until we realized the food was gone. She turned to me and beamed, practically glowing with happiness.   
"Can I kiss you?" I murmured.  
Her lips were sticky sweet, a smile stretching so far I could feel it. She twisted in my lap, wrapping her legs around my waist and tangling long fingers in my hair. I held her waist with one hand and her face with the other. With a sigh, her lips parted and her tongue cautiously swept across mine. She stole the air from my lungs like she needed it to keep her afloat and I happily let her. Would let her take my last breath if she needed. I forced myself to break the kiss, to tip my forehead against hers and try to catch my breath.  
"I love you," I whispered, lips brushing against hers.  
"I love you," she breathed.  
\--  
"I don't want to die anymore."  
I pulled my head back to look at her. She was curled against my chest as we laid in bed, a soft glow illuminating from a lamp. I slid my hand between the light sheet and Cat's bare skin, my fingers lightly running along her side. Cat twisted her hand in mine, tracing my palm absently. I stayed quiet, pressing a kiss the back of her head.  
"I haven't for a while now...not even sure I wanted to before...I just, I felt like I was drowning, y'know?"  
I nuzzled into her hair, "mhm.."  
"I'm so sorry, Stevie...for everything. I wish that I could take it all back," she sniffed, "I wish I could have spared you...been a person, not a problem."  
I shifted, rolling to look at Cat and holding her face in my hand. Wiped a tear away from her cheek with my thumb and shook my head lightly.  
"I don't...if this was us meeting for the first time, I'd do it all again. The tears, anxiety and nightmares, everything...you understand? I'd go through hell if it meant I could hold your hand. You were never a problem, you needed help. I would go through that again and again because I love you."  
She pressed her face into my hand, inhaling deeply and smiling, "I love you."  
\--  
Through therapy, Cat found that she loved working out with me. She loved finding beauty in strength, loved pushing and challenging herself to do better every day. Muscle had been building under her skin, softening once harsh angles. She was a whole new person now, proud of the muscle that helped out lift me. Liked to make a show of opening jars for me just to make herself laugh. Sometimes, I'd purposely tighten lids just to see her smile when she pried them off.   
Sure, we still had bad days. Days where I jolted awake in the middle of the night and held my breath as I waited to see Cat's chest slowly rise and fall. Days where Cat would stare out absently, fingers grabbing at curves or lightly tracing scarred skin. Scars that were hidden by tattoos now, invisible to anyone who didn't know. Days where we needed some extra love. But those times never lasted and became less frequent the more we grew.   
Cat raced up the last of the hill, panting when she turned to smile at me.  
"I beat you!"  
I jogged up the last few steps and grabbed Cat tight, lifting and spinning her around.  
"Steve!" She laughed, "put me down!"  
I set her down, spinning her so we could both look out over the cliff at Lover's Lake. Set my chin on her shoulder and hugged her gently.   
Looked over the water, shimmering silver in the golden light of the afternoon and decided this was perfect.  
I turned my face into her neck, kissing gently and murmuring, "can I keep you?"  
I was hyper aware of the weight in my pocket, of my fluttering heart and of her skin against mine.   
She turned her face, looking over at me as much as she could, "what?"   
I used one hand to spin her around, my other hand sliding into my pocket. With the cool metal between my fingers, I dropped to my knee.  
"Cat, you are...everything to me. I want to wake up next to you every day, I want to take care of you and love you for the rest of my life..."  
Her breath hitched and her fingers started to tremble in mine, her eyes tearing as she looked at me, "Stevie..."  
I swallowed past the lump in my throat and looked up at her. At the love of my life, the one person I would lay down my own life for and asked.


End file.
